-- A day of checking out the giraffes
at Haller Park with a friend.
I’d never seen these strange
animals before this moment when they came loping
up in their strange graceful walk to stare with
enormous eyes at the odd-looking tour groups.
A man from Manchester told us he
was from Manchester.
"I’m from Manchester,"
he said, as though to say, "now you know
everything there is to know about me.
"What do you think of
English people do that a lot –
tell you where they are from emphatically, as
though they are giving you the very key to their
"Oh yes?" My friend
and I smiled in reply, and I prayed he wouldn’t
start on another great topic of the English:
what transport he’d taken to get here, journey
length and which roads he’d avoided.
To my surprise we were allowed to
feed by hand with beige dog meal type biscuits.
I dunno, being Kenya, I’d
expected it to be less London Zoo and more Kenya-y
Still, it was a privilege to
experience these graceful creatures loom in so
close, large limpid eyes giving you the once over
as they frisked you for biscuits, vervets craftily
disrupting the supply chain.
A French woman shrieked as a
giraffe reached out for her biscuits.
Good grief, had she never seen a
long grey prehensile tongue before?
I guess her husband doesn’t
kiss her enough.
We met up for a drink with Nixon,
who is Mr-Butterfly-In-Chief at the park.
Nixon goes home to his upcountry
farm once a month.
He has just got his sixth goat,
which means he can now trade up for a cow.
Once he has two cows, he’ll be
able to trade for a bull.
After many drinks looking over
Tudor Creek, only some of which I spilled down my
dress, my friend and I went to Cinemax for coffee
and sat among groups of Asian friends as they
drunk coffee and smoked hubbly-bubblies.
As an English person, I’m always
massively impressed (and slightly mystified) by
people who can have a good time without vast
amounts of alcohol.
A factoid I’d heard from my
sister who got it from a cigarette card:
Q: What’s the second most
common cause of death in giraffes, if the first
is natural causes?
A: Being struck by lightning.
No idea if it’s true or not, but
wouldn’t it be great if it were?
-- Bliss: We got the
mosquito nets up and the electric fan on
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